I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND the mysterious mechanics of the universe—not like an Albert Einstein, or a Richard Feynman, or a Steven Hawking, or a Neils Bohr. I cannot see the world through the eyes of Leonardo or Michelangelo or Pollock or O’Keefe. I lack the business acumen of Jobs; the global vision of Musk; the profound mysticism of Gurdjieff. I am an ordinary man, possessed of ordinary attributes, and in the failure to reach the high places, I am, like most of us, entirely innocent.
FOR DONALD TRUMP and Benjamin Netanyahu. For Mitch McConnell and Newt Gingrich. For Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly. For Sarah Sanders and Kellyanne Conway. For Jim Jordan and Mark Meadows. For Brett Kavanaugh.
"The greatest want of the world is the want of men—men who will not be bought or sold; men who in their inmost souls are true and honest; men who do not fear to call sin by its right name; men whose conscience is as true to duty as the needle to the pole; men who will stand for the right though the heavens fall."
- Ellen G. White
AN UNUSUALLY GOOD PIECE from a columnist whose opinions I normally find wanting. Klobuchar's behavior is irrefutable evidence of poor character and questionable integrity. This is precisely the antithesis of what the country needs now. I say this as an extremely disappointed citizen who has heretofore respected her performance in the Senate, which has been generally exemplary. Unfortunately, it turns out that the price of that performance is way, WAY too high, particularly when there are so many other excellent, and it turns out, superior, alternatives. It's fine to be demanding, but if you can't treat people with dignity, you deserve public office of no kind. So thanks for stepping up, Amy. Next.
DONALD TRUMP DESTROYS everything he touches; directly, indirectly, by fiat, by implication. It is the supreme irony of a man who claims to build things. The latest victim of his carcinogenic malaise is the Covington Catholic High School, who saw fit to enable a nascent mob of young men with the express purpose of disrupting the Indigenous People’s March with ostensibly pro-life sentiments (and school chants!) Now, what abortion rights have to do with indigenous people on the political spectrum is an utter mystery, but clearly it’s a learning opportunity for a privileged all white-male school three states distant—far more important, it seems, than three days of ordinary classroom instruction that a nation full of less privileged students undertook. I’m all for field trips, of course, and it is certain that the students and the school itself learned a great deal, but I do not think this is what was intended, and the blame for the ugliness that ensued lies squarely at the feet of the “educators” who are responsible for this mess. It was a stupid idea, poorly executed, poorly supervised, and a recipe for trouble on its face.
This is great.
I HEARD SOMETHING the other day which genuinely horrified me, and I want to take a little time to try to spell out the implications as clearly as I can. It’s a bit subtle and wonky, but I think it will be worth the effort, so bear with me for a few minutes. First, I want to speak about nouns. I know, I know—nouns? Really? It’s OK, just get yourself a coffee and you’ll be fine.
THERE ARE TWO THINGS to be mentioned about the shuttering of the Weekly Standard. The first, and by far the most important, is that it is long overdue, richly deserved, and best regarded with a healthy dose of schadenfreude.
I DON’T NORMALLY COMMENT on the artwork that I create; a piece should succeed or fail on its own, without the assistance (or distraction) of commentary. That said, I’ll make an exception in this case, because it’s germane to the nature of the piece.
IT IS PERHAPS A BLESSING for all of us that Tucker Carlson is not difficult to understand. He is marvelously uncomplicated after the fashion of, say, grass-fed bovine excrement. That is, it is abundantly clear what he is, how he got here, and where he’s headed.
IT IS A TRUISM that everyone believes themselves to be a good person. About this, with apologies to Abraham Lincoln, it can be said that all of the people are wrong some of the time, and some of the people are wrong all of the time.
WE INTERRUPT THIS BROADCAST to bring you an important news bulletin. Contrary to popular expectations, Mitch McConnell isn’t dead yet.
I’VE SEEN A CERTAIN Mesmeric Revelation several times in the last couple of days — from Mystification McConnell, of course, and Ron Paul’s Lovely Blonde Wife, and Genius Christian Jerry Falwell, Jr. and the Lovely Blonde Laura Ingraham, and Tom Cotton, The Raven-haired Bobble-Throated Slapdick from the state of Alabama, and three or four others (Including The Business Man) whose collective IQs do not warrant inclusion even among these offensive Oval Portraits. I confess it caused A Loss of Breath. Among other things.
LINDSAY GRAHAM WAS ONCE a respectable human being. We know this because we all were, at one time, innocent with wide-eyed wonder, unblemished by a capricious world, and uninjured by the waking slumber of the giants in our midst. Then we grew into adulthood and became part of the problem; inured to inner search, captive to convenience, and impoverished of genuine wisdom. The best among us—but by no means everyone—have recognized this in themselves and in others, and labor in ways both large and small to ease the suffering in the world. The political class was once an honorable domain for such folk called to work in this way. No longer. Today, it is the domain of Lindsay Graham.
“I LOVE KAVANAUGH’S TONE.”
This is perhaps the most telling tweet of yesterday’s sordid Senate Judiciary Committee circus. It comes to us from one of the most tone-deaf twaddlers on the national stage, Donald Trump, Jr., whose tempestuous teeth and tongue are graced with hot flatulent bile at a frequency exceeded only by his Dear Old Dad and that pathetic wretch mouthing unmentionables for the NRA. Tone, not content, is what the Trump presidency* is all about, and Brett Kavanagh chose to dispense with the pretense of judicial temperament and fall flat on his forked tongue right into the partisan Trumpian fold. Don, Jr. loved it. The American Bar Association did not.
THE PAPER OF RECORD stepped somewhat outside it's rarefied editorial standards yesterday to publish an inarguably important but unenlightening op-end from an anonymous source inside the White House. I read it three times, not because it was edifying, but because it was edifying for all the wrong reasons. It did not tell us anything that we did not already know about either the president* or the hapless sycophants who support him. It fully confirmed the pre-publication excerpts from Bob Woodward's forthcoming jeremiad. It was entirely consistent with less formal pronouncements from the rapidly-growing list of former administration officials both on and off the record. And it comports with both widespread public observation and common sense. What it did offer, however, is unequivocal confirmation that the people in this administration, and this person in particular, are utterly spineless.
JOHN MCCAIN IS DEAD, and the nation mourns. The mediasphere has been replete with accolades and remembrances, while the naysayers have been mercifully mum-although it is in our nature that remonstrations will surely follow. This is perhaps as it should be for a public figure; none among us fully righteous, nor fully blameless, and like all of us, McCain's imperfections are what defined his character. But as a public figure, McCain demonstrated the capacity—and the willingness—to sometimes rise above his imperfections. This is why, above everything else, he has earned, and is entitled to, our respect and our admiration.
I THINK WE NEED to be somewhat less careless about the momentary come-hither of the Jeff Sessions embouchure. Remember that Sessions is unquestionably racist, dull, and thoroughly cruel, as he has been throughout his public life. He is architect of the zero-tolerance policy for immigrant families, which is arguably the the ugliest, stupidest, and most fundamentally un-American policy of any kind since Japanese interment, and he deserves to be banished to the nether regions for that reason alone.
I HAVE WRITTEN at some length about this business of supporting Donald Trump - most of it satirical, and none of it kind - and there probably isn't much more to add at this point that hasn't been said repeatedly by better writers and thinkers than I. But I remain mystified as to the mindset that could possibly facilitate anything beyond revulsion at this regime.
DEAR PRIME MINISTER TRUDEAU:
Those of us who have children know how difficult it can be to deal with temper tantrums and bad behavior and ignorance in the ways of the adult world. Some days are difficult, to be sure. What you must remember, however, is that when you deal with Donald Trump, you are not dealing with a child. You’re dealing with a dog. A somewhat different set of behaviors are required.